Thursday, June 14, 2012

Self Care-God's Command

  
When was the last time you...
Slept 7, 8, or 9 hours in a row
Ate a balanced meal
Grabbed some solitude
Prayed, read your Bible, or journaled
Showered, shaved, or otherwise cared for your body
Spent time with a friend
Did something fun
Exercised
Took your meds correctly
Relaxed

If your answer to more than one of these items is "a week or more ago," you may need some help in the self-care department. Self-care is the thing that goes out the window, when we feel the demands placed on us require more than we have to give. Self-care is the thing that requires respect for who we are and who we are capable of being, in order to follow through with. Self-care is the thing that when used well, allows us to endure hard things, enjoy fun things, and make the best of average things. Self-care is being a good steward of the resources we've been blessed with.

Usually, when I'm having this conversation, one of the strongest and most common responses I receive is, "Isn't taking care of myself, selfish? The kids need dinner, my husband wants the house cleaned, and I have to bring work home just so I can keep my job. There are only so many hours in the day. I'm just being selfish if I take a bath instead of feeding my children!" Maybe....

The Bible requires us to "Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:4. This scripture is talking about placing others at a higher value than ourselves, but in order to place others at a higher value, we have to place ourselves as having some value. The scripture does not say, "only" look out for the interests of others. It says, "but also for the interests of others. This indicates that looking out for our own interest is acceptable as long as it is not the only thing we're looking out for.

The Bible also says "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." Mark 12:30-31. Again, in order to love your neighbor as yourself, you must first love yourself. And this is included in the top two instructions we're given by the Lord! By all means, you better get yourself in that bathtub sometime SOON! It's not selfish to take care of yourself, it's only selfish to indulge when finances, time, or other factors suggest another choice would be better.

Sometimes our lack of self care is due to more than feeling selfish, poor boundaries, or poor time management. Hard times, whether that means relationship problems, financial strain, loss, depression, or something else, also keep us from taking care of ourselves. We forget the value of setting aside time for ourselves, we don't have the energy to exercise, and we don't feel like making a date with friends. More important things like paying the bills, spending time at the hospital with Mom, or having another fight with our spouse, steal our time and energy. These are the most important times to invest in self-care activities. Without proper sleep, nutrition, exercise, and emotional care, we cannot possibly step into the harsh realities of our lives in a way that allows us to fully own our reactions and take appropriate action. The best chance you have at conquering the biggest challenge in your life, begins with ensuring you remain committed to self-care in the process. Not only is it necessary for healthy functioning, but it's good practice for the harder acts of self love in your life. Things like ending a relationship, changing your spending habits, seeking counseling, or quitting your unhealthy job.

So whether it be eating better, sleeping better, getting a massage, or saying "No" once in a while, start small and get big. Get big about putting you higher on the priority list. Get big about acknowledging the difference between the you that's tired and stressed, and the you that can think straight because you didn't answer that call and got to bed earlier. Get big about taking care of the resources God blessed you with (your mind and body), instead of running them into the ground. Taking care of ourselves is not only something we shouldn't feel guilty about, but something we should feel proud to let others see. Let's show 'em how it's done!